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14


He said we were all bouncing balls, going to fall. He said it suddenly with conviction, as if he knew. And as if we listened. I didn’t. I doubt the others did.
Flecks of plaster stuck to my hair, made me wanna sneeze, slightly colored if you squinted, as if she was still lingering there, you know?
Now, of course, i wish i had. Listened.
It would have spared me the wild cheep chase. Running after and running toward.
He said hearts cannot be broken. Only scarred. But that was worse. HE said we all had it coming. He had seen it, and it wasn’t pretty.
I have to admit it had me rattled for a while. Once i remembered his words, or trying to, grasping for air inside the gates. I could afford myself some introspection, now
that i had made it here.
What are you aiming at? Apart from the immediate, i am not so sure.
He would agree it wasn’t bad. But he would ask for more texture. More to grind. Less space. He carried himself that way.
I saw him on the way to the library. He would go there for the smell. It replaced home.

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13

it’s not what it looks like. it’s much much worse. i found out the other day. The champagne was sweet, we had it opened and it was sweet. I wanted to take it for a spin so i tried to explain. About the lies. The small common misunderstandings we require to function. The looks in your eyes. They should be bottled and sold. They are a rare commodity. Take charge. Never mind the propaganda. Feel the silken soft touch. But beware the beautiful people. They are not to be trusted. What can i say? Corrosion. Corroded. Shifting shape. becoming familiar.